There is something so painfully bittersweet and beautiful about coming back to who you always were.
I don’t think I ever considered this before this moment right here, but have you ever wondered if part of the reason you’ve hidden so much from just being you, not only the too much you but also the oh so slow and unfurled you, is because, well, it takes a lot of time. A lot of space. And is really just quite a huge proclamation and statement about how worthy and of value you you think you are.
I’m sitting writing …
Dropping in …
Pool lounge-side at a rainforest hotel where I’m currently on mother-daughter getaway …
My daughter in her own pondering and musing across from me as we enjoy a pre-dinner moment of writing and silence …
And I’m thinking that this right here? This level of complete permission to just enjoy being me, in a beautiful environment, nowhere to be, initial plans canceled and the luxury of just doing precisely what we want slowly into the evening?
I don’t think I’ve given myself that for a while.
I have not taken TIME with me for a … while. Not like this.
There was a time I spent hours upon hours sitting with my own soul, pondering and dropping in on what I felt it was time for me to release for that day, being the messenger and voice who ONLY brought the fresh fire for herself and those she was here for, and it was … beautiful. In many ways. But it was also … so distorted. In all the ways which mattered.
I had to come out of the seeking of truth within ME, and by the grace of God I was delivered and did.
It feels like it’s been a million years since I have consistently luxuriously or even at all just allowed myself time to SPACIOUSLY write.
In the exact right location.
In the exact right moment.
With the exact right words brewing.
With absolutely no agenda in releasing them except the one of just allowing me to be ME.
I do not regret putting down the habit of long drawn out time waiting on creative flow, because what I’ve been doing instead, while still writing in a sort of shorter or faster way, has been taking extraordinarily long drawn out time learning to flow with the Lord.
Somebody asked me on Instagram yesterday what my daily disciplines and flow habits are, now that I’m building a brand new global movement which God has given me. (You can follow and become part of that movement @warriordaughtersrising, and also stay up to date at @katrinaruth__ for my personal brand ponderings as well as BTS of HOW I’m building that movement God-led. My stories and reels are on daily fire, so come jump in!)
The thing is, my habit of flow and dropping in before work and creative output, in fact as a pre-curser to those, has not gone anywhere. It’s just that I haven’t been doing the work and creative output much.
I’ve been learning to dance with the Lord.
I’ve been spending hours upon hours, day after day, learning to know His voice.
Learning to catch and breathe and BE His beat.
And falling,
slowly,
into a love and intimacy I never knew I always knew I longed to know.
It has been the most gradual and beautiful unfolding into flow ever.
It has also been extremely difficult at times as I have BATTLED with a screaming part of my flesh which did not want to die and felt such a fear around not PROVING its own worth through consistent output and performance.
Yet I have let her die. Again. And again. And again. Willingly.
And I have trusted that the plans God has for me? Are for hope and a future, to prosper and not to harm me, and that He surely WILL walk me into the promised land of the vision He’s given me as a writer, speaker, messenger, voice, BURNING one, when the time is perfectly now.
I find that time, incredibly, overwhelmingly, reverently, wonderfully, shockingly, yet also in some kind of way extremely mysteriously predictably, to be now.
And so here I am once more.
Finding myself in the spaciousness once more.
Where even a few minutes of our time slowly slides into HIS time and becomes ALL time and I’m just … breathing. Writing. Being. Releasing. And SEEING,
what is to be.
What this will all lead to.
What it’s calling ME to.
And the beyond comprehension gift of the fact that it means I GET to do … this.
I’m thinking about why it feels almost painful. Bittersweet. Beautiful. Nostalgic and wonderful. NEEDED, and part of me. Yet also scary. And I think it is this:
I took up a lot of space before, and every bit of it was fought for as my deepest self desperately tried to show she GOT TO BE HERE AND BE GOOD. Good meaning … worthy. Of value. Allowed. Accepted.
I knew the call on my life was huge, vast, beyond measure.
I knew how gifted I am as a writer, speaker, messenger who operates with flow and fire.
I did NOT know – not in a way I could grasp at least – that without the rock solid foundation of GOD beneath and leading it, my value and worth beyond measure because it is found and planted in JESUS, that it would always and only feel like a push I’d still not met, not matched, and never could.
And now I sit here.
Just … writing.
Conscious of the fact that the part of the dance with God where I now begin to very consistently and by His grace with impact beyond what I CAN measure write and speak and TRULY pour out a thing is … now.
Except this time?
My value is unquestionably beyond measure.
My worth is infinite and eternal, found in Him.
And the space I’m here to take up is ALL of it, because He’s given me rule and reign over ALL of it, and a specific assignment for quite a huge part of it, in which the work I’m here to do makes straight the way of the King and meanwhile I GET TO PONDER AND DREAM AND WRITE.
I get to take … as long as it takes.
For the flow.
For the fire.
For the slowest unfolding of the suddenly most incredible and bold thing.
And it is as simple and as miraculous as this:
What I always longed for is what I was made for.
Wanna know something cool about God?
He doesn’t let you rest til you find the thing it actually is, and you find it in Him.
Now don’t forget –
Life is Now. Press Play.
Kat
PS.
Level FLOW: Unlocked just arrived.
A one time live workshop event with Katrina Ruth.
And the place where we snap back in to becoming THAT GIRL where it doesn’t need to make sense again, making millions of $$$ being in the whirlwind & dance again, remembering it actually gets to be FUN again, letting it just come OUT again, the way it was meant to BE again!
We’re talking – !
- Entering the daily dance the way it just works and makes sense for YOU, so that everything which is meant to come out flows out and is OH so joyous and good
- Money FLOWS … when you flow it like this
- Just.keep.moving (how to never again get stuck in the how and meanwhile what a prolific WOW)
- “Oh really, you think you got me?” <<< the zig when they zag approach to overcoming the grip of the should, the warfare of fear, and ANY idea of operating from lack in ANY thing
- Everybody who just keeps winning knows this.
- Identity switch, AGAIN
- Trip trip tripping til you’re fly fly flying, footloose and fancy free, down the path of create, create, creating, and OH, also sell sell selling, the way you KNOW you came here to see
Girl. GIRL. GURRRRLLLLLLL.
Can we just take a breath and normalise for a SECOND being one or more decades into online biz and content creation or just being that dreamer who won’t stop dreamin’ of dreaming, maybe even making extreme amounts of money and hitting just about EVERY marker of success only to let it all fall away to make way for the new thing because ACTUALLY?
Our security was never in having to continue to be the exact.same.version with the exact.same.outcomes, and PS the better it gets the better it STILL gets and keeps on getting so here we GO again, letting out that FLOW again, being that GIRL again, and while in some ways everything changed?
In the way it’s time to admit right now you’re still the one who came here to dance and dream and BE that walking whirlwind who expects and KNOWS where she puts her hands there’s gonna be big things!
Level FLOW: Unlocked is a one time live workshop event I’m running covering everything above and THEN some, and designed entirely to ACTIVATE YOU INTO SEASON NOW.
Not only that, it’s designed to flick switch you faster crazier and more brilliantly than ever into the place where the flow flows and KEEPS on flowing.
- Where it is EASIER to do more, create more, run more, BREATHE more, because the blueprint is just be ALL of you not some dialled down careful version of you, and you woke up and remembered you’re here to pour and keep on pouring
- Where it doesn’t HAVE to make sense, in fact it makes all the sense for it to make NO sense to anybody who is not like this, because some of us literally ARE that walking wind
- Where actually ma’am. No ma’am. You do not need to launch one thing at a time. Plan it all freakin’ year. Post like you’re on consignment to the overlords of meta rather than however you feel. And in fact ma’am. Oh yes ma’am. It would ALL JUST WORK IF YOU DID ALL AT ONCE WHAT IS IN YOU TO DO, AND REALISED AS YOU DO THAT THAT WAS LEVEL ZERO BBBBYYY AND THERE’S WORLDS WITHIN WORLDS ABOUT TO APPEAR.
Permission to JUST be you again, ALSO unlocked!
And let’s get real:
God made you with the imprint you’re right now pushing down inside of you and trying to make WORK in a world you’re not even OF, just in!
You wanna glorify your Creator, BE WHO HE MADE YOU TO BE. And then some, because whatever your idea of that is HE’S IS WAY HIGHER | BETTER | MORE WONDROUS | FASTER.
So.
We’re going elbows deep into the raw bloody thick of the thing, and we’re going to RIP OUT WITH BELLS ON the part of you it’s actually meant to be.
Level FLOW: Unlocked.
Tuesday August 11 at 11AM AEST / 2AM UK // Monday August 10 at 6PM LA // 9PM NYC
$99 recommended price.
Pay what you want actual price.
https://katrinaruthministries.com/levelflowunlocked
Yeah. You need to do this.
Oh and PPS? You DO not want to miss the BTS reveal I have never shared in this way before about how I consistently produced millions of $ per year following ZERO industry rules and the exact way I’m bringing it back as this NOW new me.
it is a high quality-article
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